Completed-in-Forgetting Old Lady, Tang, Huang-Chen 2019 Action Plan
創作計畫核心
The Core of the Creative Project
成全 Completion
我的母親在我二十餘年前回國後，陷入一種大家名為“失智“的腦部病 變疾病，我跟她的逐步“忘記“不斷爭鬥，直到我落淚看到她完全忘記 一切。我由害怕、忿怒、怨尤，失望翻轉到我能擁抱她唱歌。
After I returned to Taiwan more than 20 years ago, my mother fell into a state everyone calls “dementia”. A part of her brain became sick. I continued to battle with her gradual “forgettings”, until I burst into tears when I saw she had forgotten everything. From fear, anger, resentment, and disappointment, I became able to hug her and sing.
這首我完全不解歌詞的日本童謠，曾在“我去旅行十－墓誌銘“中出 現。
This Japanese nursery rhyme, whose lyrics are a mystery to me, once appeared in “I Go Traveling X/ An Epitaph ”.
母親已邁入九十，至今仍然勇敢的活著。如果我能早一點知道這一種 “成全“，那麼相遇“失智“必是一段與患者所展開的奇幻生命之旅，而 不是悲劇。
My mother has passed her 90th year and still lives on bravely. If I could have known this kind of “completion” earlier, then encountering “dementia” would have been a journey into fantasy with the patient, not a tragedy.
所以成忘。
Thus, complete in forgettings
這個計畫從“我去旅行八－智者在此垂釣“開始萌芽，在那次的“垂釣 “裡，我刻意實地演繹了一個“聽“與“視“分裂的情境：ㄧ方面觀眾看不見我的表演，只能透過隔牆的敘述與我同步手持的錄像機來浮流其“觀賞會意“的意識，另一方面我自己則在密室，要同時任運，敘述、 觀視這兩組不同的心智符碼來浮流”演者演示“的意識。觀者、演者彼此的心智交鋒，考驗“極致“，一個小時餘，我總是精疲力盡而出。
This project began to sprout from “I Go Traveling Ⅷ / WISE MAN FISH HERE”. In that “fishing”, I deliberately interpreted a situation of “listening” and “visiting” divisions: the audience could not see my performance. I used only the video of the partition to synchronize with my hand-held video recorder to float the consciousness of the “watching mind”. From another perspective, I was in the secret room, at the same time I must serve the narrative, and watch the two sets of different mental codes to float the consciousness of the “performer demo”. The viewers and performers confronted each other’s minds and test “extremes”. After more than an hour, I was always exhausted.
一般人皆以為垂釣者不動，其實其心智無時不在覺察水流與觸動，除 非你不想得到“解碼“之結果，否則你必須運用智慧，考驗心智進入一場完全不是常態（我在旅行八指的是視與聽的“精神分裂“狀態，當然 還有種種“異常“）當中，質問是否還能繼續鏈結與演繹？
Most people think that the angler does not move. In fact, his mind is constantly aware of the movement and touch of the water. Unless you don’t want to obtain the result of “decoding”, you must use wisdom to test your mind into a completely abnormal state (I am traveling in the
eight-branched state of “schizophrenic” state of sight and hearing, and of course there are all kinds of “abnormalities”). The question is, can you continue to link and interpret?
唯“智者“能在此垂釣。
Only the “wise” can fish here.
所以成忘。
Thus, complete in forgettings
這個行動計畫要展開思考一個前瞻的社會現象，甚至，它還會隨著時 間越來越嚴重而顯著地－－忘記！
This action plan seeks to exhibit thinking about a visionary social phenomenon, which will become even more serious over time – forgetting!
如果是小說中的遺忘，也許充滿詩情；但如果在生命中出現遺忘的現 象：我忘記了！
If there is forgetting in a novel, it may be full of poetry, but if there is forgetting in real life: I have forgotten!
忘記把東西放在哪裡了？忘記剛才做了什麼？忘記要去做什麼？忘 記怎麼說話？忘記怎麼吃飯？最後 我忘記我是誰了！
Forgotten where I put things? Forgotten what I just did? Forgotten what I am going to do? Forgotten how to speak? Forgotten how to eat? Last I have forgotten who I am!
多麼驚悚，多麼可悲，多麼乖張，多麼惱人，要告訴你多少次－－“這是你的家“，你才會記得？連你的家－－你連“自己是誰“都記不起 來！
不解意的小朋友絕對可以原諒，已成年的人則有點行為怪異，至於我 的父母、親人則絕對不容許這樣！
How horrifying, how sad, how arrogant, how annoying, how many times did I have to tell you “This is your home” before you remember? Even your home – you can’t even remember who you are!
Uncomprehending children can certainly forgive, Adults are a bit strange, As for my parents and relatives, this will absolutely not be allowed!
有一天，如果不小心，我已經不知不覺成為忘記的老人，你願意為我， 回到我記得的你嗎？成全我的忘記，是否也能成全你對生命為何如此 老死的忿怒與無極的哀傷？
One day, if I’m not careful, I will unconsciously become a forgetting oldster. Are you willing to return to the you I remember? To complete my forgetting, are you able to completely explain life’s sadness and infinite grief at old age and death?